Sahityasetu

Situated amid beautiful mountain range of the Aravalis, the northern border of Gujarat used to be a lush green area with dense forest. However, now it has turned out to be almost rocky barren hills. The area, once blessed with natural beauty, is one of the most backward areas of economic and social front. However, they are rich at heart because of their cultural values and traditions.

The small hut of the tribe is called ‘Kholru’. Lack of education, ignorance and poverty make them easy prey for so called upper caste money minded people. Though the upper caste elite class may consider them backward, close look at their lives reveal true picture, coloured with emotions and affection not only towards human beings but also towards nature. Their customs and traditions are deeply rooted in their social system. They also have a rich cultural heritage consisting unique folk literature, dance forms, painting style and music.

Like any other tribal community world over, nature is part and parcel of life of the tribe of north Gujarat. Every occasion associated with their lives is directly connected with nature. They also have a great tradition of rural fairs, known as ‘Mela’ in the local language along with seasonal festivals. It is needless to say music and dance form vital part of their festivities. It is a treat to the eyes watching tribal boys and girls dancing to tune of their unique music tunes.

The tribe may be described as backward on the social and economic front but they are quite open-minded and generous in their thinking.

Love is natural to the tribal youngsters and relations between young boys and girls are not being offended by their parents and members of their family. The friendship of tribal boys and girls is known as ‘Gothia-Gothan’ tradition, means boyfriend-girlfriend.

Young boys and girls growing in the lap of nature easily fall in love. Celebrations different occasions such as festivals like Holi and Diwali, marriage functions along with going to shopping in nearby town, going to feed cattle in the jungle, working in farm provide opportunity them to get closer to each other. They fall in love and become “gothio” and “gothan”. The relationship of gothio and gothan is accepted by the society quite naturally.

‘Gothio-Gothan’ can indulge in physical relationship also. Even if any elder member of their family finds them in compromising position, they do not find anything offensive and pass with a mischievous smile on face. This is so because having sex is considered as natural phenomena unlike so called forward, broad-minded and elite class of society which is a quite reserve and hypocrite about accepting and tolerating sexual relations openly.

‘Gothia-Gothan’ tradition is widely accepted and anybody can have such relation except for cousins. The most unique and interesting aspect of the custom is the way the girl proposes the boy. Whenever a tribal girl likes a boy and wants to enter into relations with him, instead of proposing directly she asks the boy to buy a set of mirror, bangles, comb, coconut and jiggery for her. The relations get deeper as they meet again and again at different places and have a good time around.

Interestingly, the tribal youngsters cherish the relations for whole their life and not get offended by any of their relatives including spouse, children or even in-laws.

Though the tribal accepts love relationships between unmarried young couple, but extra-marital affairs are considered as crime. There is a saying : ‘Anybody can claim food from the pot, but food on the platter is only for the person for whom it is served.’ It means that a girl can have love relations before marriage, but after marriage she is the property of her husband only. In case of extra-marital affairs, sometimes the ‘Gothio’ (boyfriend) gets killed or have to pay a heavy penalty known as ‘dapu’ for his crime as compensation.

Though Gothia-Gothan tradition is quite natural and accepted among the tribes, the youngsters are shy enough to confess it openly. They symbolically express their love using songs and music as a medium. The girlfriend tries to impress her boyfriend by saying:

‘There are many flowers in my farm Uda
So many flowers in my farm
Black bee enjoys it’
(Udo’ is the name of her Gothio)
-“Look around;
There are Michael, Niagara and many other flowers.’

* ‘There are roses in my farm Gotha
Come, I will pluck it for you Gotha’

And she confesses:

You have fascinated my heart Gotha’.

She is very egoistic sometime and says:

‘You will not find a farm like mine Uda’.

She actually wants to say that there is no one like her! Relations that status as physical attraction slowly and gradually turns out to be a strong bond of love. She tells her friend “Najuri”:

“I have found dashing companion”.

How is he?

‘If he will go to Idar (town), Idar will shine brightly!!’

She poetically says to her Gothia:

‘We seated under the tree is blossoming
Let us go and see that
Where we lay down, the grass is crushed
Let us go and see that
Beloved friend, let us go and see that!’

Gothio and gothan promises each other that:

‘We will depart when death will depart us,
We will love each other until our death!’

Sometime she calls him to meet and says:

‘I am affectionate with you and only you Gotha!’

The tribal girls are quite shy and do not prefer to express her love publicly. She does not want her father and brother to know about her relations. This is why she wants to maintain secrecy of their relations and asks her ‘Gothio’ not to express love openly. She tells her boyfriend:

‘O gothia don’t send JALUKO, somebody will see it’

However, she considers her mother as a friend and is not shy open up to her.
She asks her mother:

‘My friend is calling me at small hill,
Take out cows for me from fancies behind the house ’

And adds:
’ If he comes to call me here, close the gate and
If you are not sleeping,
Please get sleep!’

She also loves to talk about her boyfriend and chats up with her mother about her love life.

A though of separation kills her. She cannot even tolerate separation from her boyfriend even for a few hours. Girl education is very low among the tribal community but the boys still get a chance to go to school for elementary education. However, the boyfriend’s inclination towards study becomes reason to worry for his ‘gothen’ as it leads to separation though for a few hours. She gets annoyed and tells:

‘O studious fellow throw away your books
Give up your study and come back!’

Like the majority of the love stories, tragic end seems to be the destiny of ‘Gothio-Gothan’. Though girls and boys from the same village can enter into a love relationship, they cannot marry each other. Therefore, many incidents of couple eloping were reported a few decades ago and their parents go hunting after them. Once caught, the couple was produced before community and community head used to levy fine on them for violation of social customs. However, it used to serve their purpose as they could marry after eloping.

Kidnapping of girl for marriage was considered as a matter of pride. Now a day’s most of the marriages are fixed by the parents. A girl cannot marry anyone else after engagement. If she runs away with her beau her father has to pay a fine to would be in-laws. After engagement, boy and girl are allowed to meet at each other’s home and they can indulge in intimate moments. After engagement, tribal youngster’s personal life starts afresh. Their love relations before engagement do not create any trouble in their life and they just turn deaf ears to it.

At time of engagement ‘Gothan’ is not happy. Her parents serve liquor and jiggery to her in law’s family. She says to gothia that:

‘What should I do?
My man is drinking liquor and eating jiggery.’

She remembers sweet incidents of the past and says:

‘O Gothia, you used to make me cry when we met at small hill.
Those days will not come again!
How much we walked together and enjoyed!’

Though it seems to be traumatic moments for her, she thinks about life ahead for her boyfriend. She can realize how lonely her boyfriend will become after separating from her. It is not easy for anybody to let sole mate enter into relations with someone else, still she asks her boyfriend to choose another partner and live happily thereafter. However, she wants her boyfriend to choose her name a like. So she advises to ‘Gothia’ :

‘Don’t be alone. Do join in with another girlfriend;
But I have one condition:
She must be on my name!’

Her only consolation is that she may not be with her ‘Gothio’ but her name will be associated with him.

Sometimes Gothan denies marrying. She tells her mother;

‘I don’t want to marry, I cannot forget my gothio.
I will die with him but
I will not go to my father – in –law’s house.’

But it goes in vain. She has to marry according to the customs of the society. Her pain goes to extreme height. She cries and tells to gothia that;

‘On our departure
All mountains, rivers, trees will not forget our love and do lament!
They will not be able to forget us!
Please don’t cry after my farewell.
Let us have last meal together.’

She urges to her gothia that:

‘I am getting married and going far away from you
But send ‘Jaluko’(reflection of the mirror),
I will come back from riding on those rays of the light!’

She knew that it will be difficult to meet again. She says:

“How can we meet again?
My dear friend
There are mountains and rivers between us.”

The social customs stand tall among them like tall mountains and flooded rivers not allowing them to meet after marriage. Post marriage meeting and indulges in love making invites wrath of their families. It may result in bloody battles and enmity between two families may continue for generations.

The age old tradition cannot be simply expressed using words and one need to feel it to understand the bond of love. This bold love-tradition is the life of the tribe. They express their love in their traditional songs, music, stories and different forms of art, which may be considered as just art forms but it is their way of life. Once a civilization breaks away with its traditions and customs, it faces the problem of identity crisis. It is not possible in so called civilized society in India to express their love openly but it is a natural process for tribal. They express their love boldly.

This can be songs, stories or art for us but it is their life. No one can separate them from their own traditions. A human being cannot live without love whether they stay in a jungle or a city. Love of the a couple may be suffocated by social customs in so called civilize society but the love of ‘Gothio-Gothan’ blossoms like flowers. They do not bother about any restrictions. These tribal people may be backward or uneducated but they are open-minded and generous. They sing love songs into their last breath and remember their growth and go than with joy. Their family members also enjoy it! Its unique relationship and so called civilized society can learn lots from the tradition of Gothia and go than from tribal people.

* I have taken all references from Dr. Bhagvandas’s two books: ’Fulro ni ladi’ and ‘Lila moria’.

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Dr.Dipak Raval
M A Parikh FINE Arts & Arts College
G D Modi Vidysankul, Palanpur – 385001
District: Banaskantha. GUJARAT. INDIA
Mobile no:09998402254